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BIGGEST DECISION OF MY LIFE [20 Apr 2010|11:16am]
[ mood | crushed ]

 heartbreaking news....a situation i have never ever wanted to be put in. Do i pull the plug or let her live until her birthday ( which is a day before mine)

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[ mood | bitchy ]


here's the scoop..i am now 21 on the verge of 22 and from the looks of it...shit hasn't changed. 

I have gone in and out of relationships. I try staying single, but i guess like the amigos say " i can't". I cannot help it! I'm single for a few months and i date multiple ppl at the same time and a guy usually sticks out....this time Fernie. I wasn't looking, he just happened. BUT like always....drama. I decide to actually give my heart away since the last jerk " the little one"..and what happens....squishes it like a bug! he was still talking to his ex ex ex ex ex girl friend from a million yrs ago!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! TO TRUST OR NOT TO TRUST AGAIN?/ hmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm......as of right now... i don't trust the guy for shit...i guess he's some comfort right now for my current situtation- for all i know he's fuckn the bitch 'cuz if i learned anything WHERE THERE IS A WILL THERE IS A WAY! and if he is actually be true. i will find out in due time..i  actually thought that he was the 'it' guy. i kept getting glimpses of my future with him included( creepy i know). Ii has never ever been hard to get a guy, but i have never really fallen, since freddy. ughhhhh!! i totally have trust issues now. It's like should i stay or should i go? does he really care? and the part that sucks is that all my fuckn ex boyfriends call on occasion( even freddy) and i can't change my number cuz rob ( my step dad) controls it , and i manage in not talking to them and he couldn't!


other news...the grandma..my MOM..my EVERYTHING...IS IN A COMA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! i feel like dying! i have all this rage and can't get it out. I tried the punching bag, drinking, hanging out with the friends..ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh .....SOOOOOOOOOO SAD..

AND......i had an apt and decided to leave it and move back to my mom's ( my family took off to temecula my jr yr w/ out me =( been solo ever since)...but i decided to move back 3 months ago..lol couldn't cut it....now i'm back with no real place of my own. suppose to be staying with my dad now( the creep!!) ..but i occasionally sleep at fernie's!

GOOD NEWS: my major hasn't changed....still going for electrical engineering...

Anyways, i will be udating

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love [14 Jan 2006|11:01pm]
wow........i'm back!!!!!!

why does love have to be so complicated? Why is it that the one person who can put us at our highest can keep us at our lowest? WHY? WHY? WHY? "Love is giving one person the ability to destroy you, but trusting them enough not to." Who do u trust?

I've been screwed over so many times.My friends are always telling me I need to get over the relationship stage. Damn, this guy..whome i haven't been able to forget since freshmen year...the love of my life....my everything has screwed me over! I don't understand it.I love the kid to death. He isn't the type of person who shows his emotions to justt anyone, but he opened up to me and then just slammed his door in my face. Is it fear? Is it regret? Does he even love me? Did he mean what he said? DAMNIT! I'M SO LOST RIGHT NOW!
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chillin [27 Mar 2004|10:22pm]
damn it! i havn't updated in a while. Sorry Charlie. Well, i've been happy these past few days cuz Marcus, Nick, zack and i have been going out.Oh, and Zack and i are a couple now. Wow, he's too good to be true. the thing that really sux is that he's senior and i like him a lot- i don't want him to graduate. When he does i hope things don't change for the worst,that's the only thing that scares me. other than that things are cool cuz he's cool with me and my familia. marcus, nick and zack always come over my house and my parents think they're great kids,awwwwww! well, g2g now.
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forgot about rios pizza [28 Feb 2004|11:36am]
[ mood | bouncy ]

Dude, i haven't had time to update my journal cuz my sis is always on the internet! Well, this thursday and friday were cool.

On thursday after we took our swimming pictures nick,marcus,my sister and i met up with zack( a cutie i just met-my bro.),sammy jo, sarah,melissa v.,and brittany to go to rios pizza. We all went in one car-Marcus in the trunk!we busted an uncle robbies again.the pizza was good and being that wer're all pigs, we ended up going to baskin robbins and starbucks.ahhhh,handle!!

Friday was way better. marcus, nick, zack, and i didn't go to school cuz we just kicked it at melissa's house. We ate Micky D's for breakfast then kicked it for a while. We all wanted to watch a movie so zack took us to q-star and we rented faces of death. When we were getting out of the parking lot zack backed up and ended up hitting the trunk of a parked truck! Damn, the guy that owned the truck ran out of q-star fast. zack got out of his car and had to examine both cars with the dude and nothing happened to the dude's truck, but zack's trunk got fucked up! that sucks! we just headed back to melissa's house, watched the movie and headed back to school during 6th for practice. We're supposed to all go out later today.i'll update .

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clown car to Uncle Robbie's adventure [24 Feb 2004|05:35pm]
[ mood | crazy ]

Today was tight!After swimming workout chad gave melissa, nick and marcus and i a  ride in his chad mobile to uncle Robbies. That shit was so funny cuz we couldn't even fit in it. Marcus and nick tried going in the back first with melissa and i in the front( the stick shift was going up my crack, damn that shit hurt)Let me remind you that the chad mobile is a two seater. So,melissa was sitting on my lap.The tires were getting scratched because of the weight in the back so we had to pull over and rearrange ourselves. Girls were now in the back and the guys in the front. I couldn't breathe! Melissa was suffering because she could practically feel the tires & there was a lot of speed bumps! Well, we busted a sick mission, but hey, we got there and grubbed down.Yeah!

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PICS I HAD LAYING AROUND [16 Feb 2004|10:21pm]
[ mood | cheerful ]

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POLO HOMIES [16 Feb 2004|10:13pm]

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[16 Feb 2004|10:10pm]

This is yvonne and marcus at the polo game
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[16 Feb 2004|10:09pm]
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[16 Feb 2004|10:07pm]
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viva mexico [16 Feb 2004|05:45pm]

Man i haven't updated in a while.


i had a polo game on Saturday. when i got back from the game i ended up going to monci's house to kick it and grub down because there was a  barbeque going on. We called Nick later and planned on going to the movies. Marcus wanted to take the bus to uptown whittier(Crazy goose). We He just convinced his grandpa to take us, so we picked up Nick and watched "You got served". It was the shit. i got home later that day like at 9:15 and i was suprised cuz i didn't get in trouble, and i made up i badass story too.What a day.


Dude, yesterday my familia, Rob's familia & i went to Puerto Nuevo to eat lobster.Mmmmmmm, fresh tortillas, rice and beans.Tight! i bought a couple of things too, like a bag, and a necklace. i bargained for them sick status. i like going over there just to haggle. amber on the other hand got ripped off because she paid ten bucks for a dumb necklace.Duh! what a dork. We went into a club in Rosarito- my kinda thing.Yeah! then a couple of guys got arrested for fighting and the police was beating them down. After that we just had trouble crossing the border. That's about it.

Laterz Alligatorz

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Just Kick'n It [05 Feb 2004|08:45pm]

It was pretty tight today!

 When i got to school i had met up with Marcus, Brittany, and Sammy-jo and we left to micky d's w/out dinero! We managed to ask around for money and rounded up 6 bucks-TIGHT!

School was boring.... After school Marcus, nick and I jammed to grub down at Uncle Robbies(mmmmmmmm..)Then we were being stupid at Ross, Marshalls and the at&t store. Marcus was crazy cuz he wanted to go to vons so that the picketers can yell and throw thing at us-I don't think so homie! We didn't end up going to vons cuz we just ended up going home.

Oh, and i saw Art today too-damn he fine!

I'm looking foward to tommorrow cuz its basketball homecoming(yay)

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Marcus and I were kickin' back in ASB and wanted to take pictures. Ahhhhh-The homies!! [03 Feb 2004|10:15am]

Marcus and I were kick'n it in Asb and decided to take some pictures. Ahhhhhh- the homies!

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[03 Feb 2004|10:08am]
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[27 Dec 2003|05:28pm]
[ mood | sick ]

 my lil bro wearing a pink beanie!

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nothin' much [17 Dec 2003|09:43pm]
[ mood | depressed ]


         Well, since my little sister (hiker2) has been messing with this live journal stuff i decided to do so as well. I think this shit is bad ass.

         Here i go.....

       I've been feeling really bad lately-like my self-esteem is down to 0.What can i do? I think I need some kind of therapy or something cuz i'm stuck in depress mode. What sucks about this, is that this crap has happened to me and my bro. before,and we actually had to see a shrink cuz we were labeled "suicidal"(by my mother). That's so retarded! I hope my mom doesn't notice anything strange going on with me- who knows what else she'd have me do.I don't care about things as much as i use to. I guess, it's just a little stress, so i need to pull myself back together.

       Gotz to go Cheerio, Laterz Alligaterz

                                                       -Dre (pooka)

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